Art Is Life Motherhood
[sigh] The last time I wrote here, my daughter Miah was just a little over a month old and I had absolutely no idea what being her mommy was going to be like. She's now FOUR MONTHS OLD! The whirlwind that followed has been whiplash-inducing.
First off, I heartbreakingly left my position at Native American Natural Foods after nearly eight years with the company and I closed up shop at my location in Yeager Office Suites of Plano. During this time I've been in complete awe of Miah's rapid growth, strength, abilities, and beauty. But as you can imagine, making the tough decisions I did was a big deal. A MAJOR DEAL. I know what I imagined....and it was idealistic. I pictured raising her at the studio almost immediately and working my marketing job at the same time. I know there are some amazing super moms who probably could do all of this but for me it became all too much and as you already know I am always candid about my path. I had to put Miah ahead of everything.
First of all, she showed signs almost immediately of a baby who wasn't going to lie down much. I mean, babies grow fast but even friends remarked she seemed a little ahead of the curve in a lot of ways. She is such a watcher, super nosy, and listens to everything. "She's so alert!" was something I heard from strangers and how well she kept her head up even after just being a little over a month old. She began to attempt standing directly on us around the later part of two months old, then started running up our chests as we held her so we got her a little activity walker to practice even more. The deal is she isn't tall enough yet to even reach the floor so we put a box under her to stand and create movement. Also? She's a comedian. Hint: See video on this page.
Again, I was idealistic. I get exhausted, just as any mother would, but the pressure of keeping a space open was a bit much while these early months have gone by swiftly. Rent is due whether or not you are in the office and working in a hip co-working space (no changing table in the bathrooms hehe) probably wasn't the best for my neighbors as Miah can be...well...vocal. She is the best work of my life and the hardest. I've since received countless loving help from my parents, which has given me more time to work. I'm very thankful for them.
So now is where I need to dig deep.
What is next for me besides the obvious work I do and love? I've had a space for three years and it's an odd feeling to go back to being strictly remote again. I occasionally flirt with the idea of another website centered on the art of motherhood - Art Is Life Motherhood. I bought the domain, I use the hashtag, I've started silly videos. I've not gone deeper into it -- keeping it pressure-free and casual. You can see some of them on my Facebook page. There aren't many yet but I now understand why there are so MANY mommy bloggers -- it's cathartic. I'm going to see where it takes me down the road and if anything it's a little entertainment to see my pitfalls and challenges through with humor.
Art Is Life Studio was never just a space. It is who I am and what I want to bring out into the world using the skills and talents I have enjoyed for years. I'm OK saying I am not sure what it will ultimately look like. I don't think I was OK saying it before, however. You really put your identity into what you are passionate about and opening lovely creative spaces was a big part of that for me. Now I'm navigating a rebirth to coincide with the birth of my most important creation. We'll see how it goes so please stick around.